Life After the Big Day

Hi Everyone! 

Happy November! Can you believe we are already in the same month as Thanksgiving? I sure can’t. I am sure you are all wondering what life has looked like for Patrick and I now that the wedding is over. Some of you assume I moved off to South Carolina because you saw Patrick moved there shortly after the wedding and I joined him on the road trip out there and helped him move in. Well, unfortunately, we are STILL not living together. 😦

So, life after the big day has been busy. After our honeymoon we went back to work for a couple weeks.  I joined Patrick in Texas one last time to say good-bye to our favorite state thus far and venture off to South Carolina. I helped him move in and get situated in the new apartment and then, once again, said “see ya next time.”

The question comes about often, “how is married life?” I simply can’t fully answer that yet. To be fully transparent, I haven’t had the time of day to change my name between traveling and work, we don’t live together and it’s becoming tougher and tougher, and my parents totally redecorated my room while I was gone to turn it into their guest room. So, here I am, struggling with the heartache of not only a distant relationship, but a distant first year in marriage for what? For my parents to remind me I’m married and they want my accumulation of “stuff” to start moving it’s way out of their house? lol

It’s incredibly tough, but I’ve chose to stay here for now for my own career. Not many of us military wives make the decision to not move with our husbands or significant others as soon as or even before we are married. We never really know when we as spouses will have to do distance, not by choice, due to a detachment, deployment, or any other various trainings they are put through, so maximizing time together is important. Not so tough of a decision for me at first because well we’ve been distant for four years now, so what was one more year? Well, one more year means training is over and he is deployable, so it may turn into two more years and at that point, we might have lived together for a total of six solid months. Crazy to think about, but now the dream that was once just having our wedding day has now turned into a dream of when move-in day will be and actually starting our lives together.

I am finally in the position at work I have always wanted to be in my career, so it’s challenging for me to throw it all away after only a couple months of being in my new role. The job has presented its challenges and I take each day at a time weighing out my end result. I am still pondering the options and how we can make this whole situation work because at the end of the day, I’ve outgrown my space in California and I am ready to fulfill my role as a wife, not just be called a wife.

At the end of the day, I hope I can encourage whoever is reading this and potentially having the same struggle to follow your own path and achieve your own goals in life while also being a present member of your relationship to not lose faith in each other. Trust that when it is meant to be and timing is right, you will be together. Now, I am praying that our days apart are coming to an end.

Thanks for reading and Happy Veterans Days to all of our armed forced and their families who make sacrifices everyday!

Be sure to follow me for more posts! @CarolineKaufer

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