Hey friends! I know many of you have been asking how my fiance and I have been able to “do the distance.” Well, I’m here to share with you all of our tips on how to make it work! Let’s rewind about three years when Patrick left to fulfill his dreams as a Marine Pilot after he graduated college. Our one year anniversary of dating was coming up right after he left so, it was tough to watch the guy I had spent every day of my first year of college with leave to the other side of the country, for who knows how long. After about a month of him being gone, we quickly learned we needed to give ourselves something to look forward to every month or every other month, otherwise, you focus too much on how difficult the time apart is rather than looking forward to the time you will spend together. We’ve made it work thus far, so we must be doing something right! So here are our top 10 things that have helped us get through the past three years together.
1. Build a strong foundation If you weren’t able to spend a solid amount of time together prior to your distance. Make sure to spend time having quality talks and getting to know each other’s backgrounds and foundation before trying to build your own foundation together. Thankfully, we were able to take a year to be together before being distant to grow together.
2. Have FaceTime dates whenever possibleWe like to face time at least twice a week, if not once. It doesn’t always work out this way but, we don’t let it ruin our day or week if we can’t make it work with our schedules.
3. Have faith in each other Being in a distant relationship there’s nothing worse than not being able to hang out with your friends because your partner doesn’t want you to go out and have fun without them. You need your friends as your support team because you aren’t always together to entertain each other. We promised each other we would never hold one another back, but would always have trust and be faithful.
4. Have each other’s backs through the tough timesWhen he might be having a rough week with work and I am stressed about my future or my job, we give each other words of encouragement and remind each other that we are there for each other. We say, “I support you 100%,” “if you need anything, I’m here,” “we can get through it together.”
5. Find your person who can survive distance without being distantWe grew to realize that investing time into one another is the key to having such a strong relationship because you do become a team and your team won’t survive without the effort of both people.
6. If you can be there, be there
You can talk the talk, but can you walk the walk? If we ever have an opportunity to be there, we make sure to be there. You can pretend to care, but you can pretend to be there.
7. Be silly and laugh a little
We find the funny in everything. From him growing a mustache, to me obsessively buying pool floaties. We laugh at/with each other above all else. You can’t hang onto the fact that you aren’t physically together, rather hang onto the fact that you are on the same page and still supporting each other.
8. Learn the tricks of travelingInvest in a good credit card that gets you lots of airline miles because that makes it a lot easier on the wallet if you just need that weekend trip to see each other and spend time together but the $500 plane ticket is not in the question. Thankfully, Patrick is so good with finding all the deals, so he got us both some great credit card deals that were easy to rack up a TON of miles on.
9. Visit each other as much as possibleAgain, we’ve definitely had to do our research to figure out how we were going to be able to afford plane tickets every month or two. But, that was about the time period when we were missing one another and if I could get a weekend off of work, you bet I would be on a plane Friday morning to wherever Patrick was.
10. STAY FAITHFULIf you truly love each other, this isn’t difficult. We always go out to bars and have fun with our friends and rather than getting mad that a girl was flirting with him, I ask what stories he has from last night and they usually turn into a pretty good laugh and visa-versa. We laugh together because we trust one another.
And that’s a wrap! 10 things that Patrick and I have learned throughout our years of dating that has kept us together and has kept us growing closer together as a couple to continue the rest of our lives together!
Thank you all for reading along and showing so much love and support! Please feel free to send in any blog requests and follow me on Instagram @carolinelopresti
*All photos are taken by professional photographers, Sammi Stotts, Jessica Bertken and Nicole Keel*